Sometimes it seems that God’s main way of communicating with me is through colds and flus.
I’m acting like the world will fall apart if I deviate from my routines for a day? Routines fall apart because I’m exhausted.
I’m feeling whiny about not having enough time for all projects? Two days up in smoke so I can recover, and no closer to having my projects done.
Feeling obligated to go to a bunch of social events when I’d really just like to stay home with my husband? Social calender cleared with no guilt, to avoid giving germs to people.
I don’t really mind the last effect at all (though I wonder if there’s a way to achieve it without getting sick…), and I’m beginning to get the message about the first types of effects. And I can’t complain too much. After all, it’s better than droughts or locusts or something.
I do start to wonder though–is it that hard to get my attention? Isn’t there a slight nudge that could wake me up and make me notice my arrogance/laziness/complaining a little faster than being sick for a few days?
And then I just start to overthink the whole thing. Here I am, sick again, and I can’t identify any of my usual patterns in it.
Sure, I was just clearing my to do list and looking forward to getting to some of my projects I’d been putting off for a while, but I know this is just a slight delay, and for whatever reason I’m not even feeling whiny about it.
Sure, I was just getting some of my routines more firmly in the groove and will have to spend a day or two catching up (I was at a week and half staying completely caught up on dishes before getting sick, which I consider quite an accomplishment), but again, it’s just a delay, and I’m pretty sure I can get back in the groove again.
It wasn’t even a week where we had much scheduled.
So what in the world is God trying to tell me? What deep message am I missing?!? Why would anything happen that wasn’t all about me and what I need to…